What's my wooden beam?

Homily

8th Sunday in Ordinary Time C

27 February 2022

St. Lawrence Catholic Campus Center at the University of Kansas

AMDG

What's my wooden beam?

That's easy! Can I name more than one?

Jesus does me the favor again in today's Gospel of reminding me that I am a hypocrite.  The problem is never ultimately that I have a wooden beam in my eye, but when I think I don't.  

So what's mine?  I don't know if these are the biggest, but it's easy to think of three.  I don't ask for help.  I don't know how to say no.  I'm addicted to being alone

Whenever from my heart I say I got this, I can handle more, or leave me alone, I'm speaking from a store of evil, which is to say I am drawing from a store of fear and pain.  These things never inspire people, but always set a bad example.  

What sets a good example/  What teaches well?  Courage, vulnerability and generosity always sell.  Yet I prefer to pretend to know more than I know and be better than I am.  

My one job right now is to connect the truth and grace of our Catholic faith to college students, that they might be free to truly live.  I have no clue how to do that.  The more I learn, the less I know and the more confused I get.  People are mysteries to be encountered, not puzzles to be solved.  I am a shepherd not a surgeon.  I'm a dad, and dads don't know how to control the behavior of their kids.  I spent 4 hours in a friend group Friday night, a group of parents of kids ages 5 to 16.  Four hours wasn't even good enough for a warmup of discussing how to parent.  Nobody has it all together or all figured out.

When it comes to the mystery of life, what's most important is not that I fake it well, but that I live with courage, vulnerability and generosity.  Those who pretend they don't need a teacher, much less a Savior, aren't helping anybody.  They are the blind leading the blind, out of a store of evil.

What's the work of me removing the wooden beam?  I need to ask how I can get better, and stop being afraid of letting go of things.  It's also letting people into my mess, for when I hide it, it never gets better.

I have my work cut out for me.  So do we all.

What's your wooden beam?