Wedding Homily

2 July 2011
Memorial of the Immaculate Heart of the Blessed Virgin Mary

It is an extraordinarily happy day for me as a priest, to be able to witness what is known in the business of priesthood as a 'real wedding.' Not that every wedding does not have its own good parts and blessings, but this one in particular is good through and through. Not only because this couple are Jayhawks, although that does not hurt one little bit. No, this couple is as prepared to speak the words that will make them no longer two, but one flesh, as any couple I have ever had the privilege to witness. They are prepared to speak profound words to each other, in imitation of Christ who has first loved them and given up his life for them, because of the foundation of faith given them by their families, and thank you and congratulations to the families for this. Yet they are able to speak words that truly call down the Holy Spirit upon each other, they are able to give each other this sacrament, because they have listened very personally as Christ has spoken to them in the depths of their hearts - this is my body, broken for you - my blood, poured out for you. They enter into this sanctuary in full knowledge of what happens in this sanctuary every time they attend Mass. So they are prepared for the depths of what will happen today. But they would also be the first to tell you that they are not prepared - they are chosen despite their unworthiness. This couple has discerned a call to marriage that goes much deeper than a couple falling in love and wanting to spend their lives together, although that too is indispensable. No, this couple has also discerned deeply the meaning of vocation, of receiving a call from God that goes far beyond - is much bigger and last longer and is more fruitful - than any choice they could ever make for themselves. I am happy to say as a vocation director for the Archdiocese, that this couple has given God every opportunity to call them first to the priesthood and religious life. The groom for his part, has pondered the call to make the love of Christ present as only a priest can; the bride, the call to belong completely to Christ as his bride, showing the world as a religious sister how to fruitfully receive the love of Christ as the Immaculate Heart of Mary first received Christ perfectly in the world. Then Kiernan messed that all up, as the story goes. She introduced these two, and over time, clear internal and external signs have shown today's marriage to be the will of God, something this couple is choosing, but much more important, something they are allowing themselves to be chosen for, something that is being done to them. This couple would be the first to tell you that they could never be prepared for, nor worthy of the mystery they are about to give each other. Yet they have arrived at this moment because they have discerned their vocation well, and they cannot say anything other than 'yes' to what God wants to do in this moment.

It is clear from the readings that this couple chose from our meditation that they understand the responsibility they have to make their spouses and their children, God willing, holy. This couple has discerned that marriage is their chosen path to holiness; it is the best way to arrive at the deepest desire of their hearts, to become a saint by following the path of perfect love. Marriage will provide many such opportunities to die to self, but this couple is encouraged first by the reading from Sirach, which beautifully shows how a wife may help her husband to grow in holiness, and the reading from Ephesians, which speaks of a husband's responsibility to make his wife holy by the way he gives up his life for her. Once again, however, this couple would humbly admit that they have a hard enough time being holy themselves, and that they are especially ill-equipped and prepared to take on the added responsibility of making another person holy. That is why the first thing they will do as a married couple is to turn to Christ in the Holy Eucharist, to Him alone who is able always to make a perfect gift of Himself. The best thing that this couple can do for each other is for each of them individually to go deeper in their relationship with Christ, and the seal and guarantee of their marriage is the sacrament of the Eucharist, where Christ marries His bride the Church and makes Her holy by the gift of Himself. It is in receiving this gift of Christ consistently in their marriage, that this couple may make their marriage for a lifetime a real participation in the marriage of Christ and His Church that lasts forever. It is through the hope that Christ Himself will be present and active in their marriage that this couple has a certain hope that they can arrive at the holiness for which they sincerely pray. It is most fitting then, that this couple have as the liturgical anniversary of their marriage, this Memorial of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, for in Her Immaculate Heart alone did God find that perfect tabernacle in which His Son would dwell. This couple should never forget how much our Lady has to teach them in welcoming Jesus Christ into the heart of their marriage.

Finally, this couple has chosen for their Gospel the sincere prayer of Jesus that after his ascension, there would be those disciples who by their word and example, might make his truth and his love real and believable in the world. All that I have said so far about this couple, they already know, and they did not need me to repeat it to them. The reason that we are here is because God has also trusted and chosen this new couple to be his witnesses in the world, and that through them, and through their act of faith in God and in each other today and everyday, you and I might be renewed in our faith in Jesus Christ and his promises, and might find living symbols of his love in the world. It is the sincere desire of this couple, most of all, that you see not only the love they have for each other, but the love that Jesus Christ has for them. It is his everlasting and perfect love that makes today possible. It is in His love that this couple has chosen to put their deepest trust. Their prayer today is for you and I to be touched once again by this love, and to prefer nothing to the love of Jesus Christ. Amen.